||[May. 9th, 2011|02:59 am]
That was a weird day.|
Started with being woken up by Ben calling at 1:30am. We have been on notspeaking terms for months, so it jostled me into being very awake despite not answering. Woke up again at 6:30 after having a horribly intense dream about trying to seduce him and him resisting because he loves his girlfriend so much.
He gchatted me about an hour later to apologize for calling so late. He called, apparently, because he and his girlfriend broke up. So he can talk to me again.
They broke up because she read this email from me:
the only times i feel like you're engaged are when we're talking about sex. and i don't like talking to you about sex. i mean, i do, because i like the attention and it makes me feel like you still care about me. but we can't have a friendship like that, and i hate that you do that to your girlfriend. even though i hate her.
Amazing. The universe is a just and fair place after all.
Couldn't go back to sleep after that so I went for a (hard) run, showered, and headed off to LA. Normal meditation and yoga classes, although for some reason I started having crazy panic anxiety about not hearing from the Professor, even though we have a standing Sunday date.
He finally texted me during yoga and I asked if he would go see this Elliott Smith documentary with me. He declined and was incredibly difficult and annoying about it. I was torn between acquiescing to his obnoxious request that I come over afterward (and feel like a whore) vs telling him I would just see him in 5 weeks when he gets back from Europe.
Mid-annoyance, I went to my coffee shop in Santa Monica, where I ran into Martin. We had this conversation:
Me: Hey! I thought you were working all day!
Him: I AM working.
Me: Ok...then I'll just sit here and not bother you...
I thought when he got to a good stopping place he would chat for a few minutes but he completely ignored me until I left. Annoying x 2.
I gave up on humanity and ventured off to find the theater the documentary was playing at. I had a couple hours to kill so I figured I would park and find a bar/restaurant to get very drunk/have dinner at. But it turned out to be in the ghetto, so instead I got lost for a while in the middle of downtown LA and ended up buying 2 mini bottles of Moscato to stuff in my purse for during the movie.
The movie. It was great. It wasn't particularly well-made, but Elliott Smith. Man. And his fiancee was actually there at the theater. Los Angeles.
The Professor kept texting me to make sure I was coming over after, and I made it there a little after 10, exhausted. We promptly got into a full on actual fight over America and Osama bin Laden of all fucking things, and neither of us was particularly apt at defusing it. I mean, he tried, but he wanted to win too badly. I felt like I held my own, all things considered, but it was definitely not one of my better arguing performances. At one point I got so annoyed I put on my coat and shoes to leave, but I guess it was at least partly a bluff, because I didn't want to end things that way before he went out of town.
We both kind of allowed a detente situation to arise, and I curled up against his shoulder finally and we had unremarkable sex. He kind of tried to kick me out ("I have a really busy day tomorrow...") before I was ready and I told him to shut up, he was leaving for so long I deserved a few more minutes. And he agreed with this.
On the way out he gave me his mountaineering socks. Whenever I come over in flip flops my feet get cold, and I borrow a pair of socks, and he puts his mountaineering socks on me. So as we were leaving, he asked if I wanted to take them home for while he was gone. And he walked me out and teased me about my shredded wheat and my garden and kissed me a lot but not enough and then I came home.